At some point I thought I should start to record my spiritual journey to date. As I began that process, i discovered it was hard for me to pinpoint what began my spiritual journey. In some ways I was tempted to reference a major surgery over covid, and that would not be incorrect, as I certainly experienced some major spiritual shifts due to that circumstance. But was that truly the BEGINNING? To that, I had to say no. I was spiritual long before that. Wasn't I? I certainly had opinions on organized religion, I was raised in the Catholic Church. I learned about and formed opinions on historical periods, and on life and death, opinions that were definitely rooted in my spiritual existence. Right?
As I struggled to figure all of this out, perhaps, I decided, it would be best to define Spirituality before trying to figure out when I started down it's path. So, here it is...
spir·it·u·al·i·ty
/ˌspirəCHəˈwalədē/
noun
the quality of being concerned with the human spirit or soul as opposed to material or physical things.
The first thing I noticed was the absence of religion in the definition of being spiritual. For some reason the two seemed tied to one another, but in reality, they are not. A spiritual journey is a very personal one that may or may not include religious affiliation. For some it is a large part of the journey, for some it just is not a part at all.
So, What did this mean for my quest to find a beginning? It seems, I thought, that by definition
I was born into my very own spiritual journey. I had certainly always had some concern for my human spirit or soul. I didn't look at my existence as a journey quite in this way, of course. I only realized I was on such a journey when that journey turned into a bit of a roller coaster ride. Life had handed me more than I'd ever had to deal with, and I had to evaluate how I was dealing with life. I had to look deep within this person I called me, and decide who I was and in turn, who I wanted to become. I had to examine what made me, me. Sounds very cliche I suppose, but in the moment it seemed pretty impossible. I just was. I had never considered the how or why. I was very busy being me all the time, every day. Now I started to think about whether I was the me I wanted to be or that others wanted me to be. Had I truly lived over 40 years not really knowing me? That's a tricky thing to figure out. Where does one begin to decide who they are at this age?
This awareness is NOT where I started my journey, but it is the point in time that I became aware that I was on a journey. I was suddenly aware that I was part of something bigger than myself, that required me to really know who I was. It was at this same moment that I realized that Spirituality was actually a form of self acknowledgment and of self respect. It is self discovery and self love in it's most pure form. Spirituality was, indeed, that simple. And that complex. This revelation, for me, was indeed a true BEGINNING. The beginning of me PARTICIPATING in my spiritual journey. A spiritual awakening, if you will.
If I have learned nothing else, I have learned that the second in which we think we know, is the second in which we are most mistaken. I continue to learn, grow, and journey. I now do so as an active participant in my spiritual growth, rather than a spectator. As far as figuring it all out up to this point, well... Stay tuned for some interesting stories, but I've decided that learning from my past, finding the positive in what's happened, and creating growth and progress within my life is way better than trying to interrogate the universe. It's my job to be me. Turns out the universe is busy with some other things.
Thanks for joining me for a little piece of my journey. I hope to be a tiny part of yours. You are beautiful, Have a blessed day!
Stephanie Kuypers
Simply Spiritual
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